I headed out to Double Bay to share a delightful brunch with my friend. It was really nice to go somewhere different and in a different area of Sydney. I highly recommend checking out the eastern suburbs for a breakfast by the water. This cafe didn't have waffles and their pancakes and French Toast were riddled with additional fancy flourishes that I couldn't even pronounce. Don't get me wrong, I love additional touches to my already sweet and sugary breakfasts but there is a line in breakfast foods. You can't cross this line. It ruins what was once a perfect meal. If you already didn't get it, I love all things sweet, especially for every single meal of the day. I have had to give that up since starting my health journey and in all seriousness it isn't easy going cold turkey. As soon as I knew I couldn't have sugar, it was all I craved and yes, I have cheated a few times but that is how we learn to control these cravings (I honestly don't know what i'm talking about)
The greatest thing I accomplished over the weekend was catching two trains by myself. I have a severe irrational fear of trains and i'm not entirely sure why. The voice that makes the announcements over the speakers is seriously intimidating and the hustle and bustle of all the people gives me anxiety and sensory overload. I just need a second to think and read the signs but everyone else seems to know where they're going and it freaks me out.
I'm scared i'll get on the wrong train and end up on the other side of Sydney. I'm scared i'll fall off the platform and die. I'm just scared of trains in general, you know?. I know I am not the only one with an irrational fear, like those people who are scared of tiny holes or clowns. Irrational, yet common. I used to be scared of planes but no more. I surprisingly got over that one pretty quickly which is handy as I have hopes to travel in the near future. Oh my god I would love to see New York. I know travelling to America seems generic and not very exciting but nevertheless I try not to let other's opinions colour my own. Maybe it will be just another average city that is filled with disease ridden pigeons but I would like to see that for myself.
I think I may have an idea of what to do for my 21st but it will take time and preparation. Gotta get onto these things nice and early. A trip away sounds good. Perhaps somewhere warm but cheap. I would loved to do a party or a big dinner but I don't think I have enough friends for that. Plus there would be people that couldn't come or would have better things to do. That would be pretty sad and a massive slap in the face but you can't control other people's feelings about you unless you're a vampire. Does that happen in The Vampire Diaries? I think I saw it in a show or a movie somewhere.
I've made the decision to maybe go back to uni. The first step is to find a course that I am interested in. I would love to do something in the creative arts but that can be limiting when coming to job opportunities. I am pretty scared. I'm scared that i'm even considering it but I think i've just got to do it no matter the fear. I talked on the phone to a guy at macquarie but he didn't really help. In his defence I couldn't articulate myself well and next time I think i'll write a script.
Zumba and pilates starts next week and i'm pretty keen. I'll feel so much better about myself knowing i'm actually doing something and whats more than that, i'm doing something with my best friend. What a bonus!
Sarah